The importance of noticing the small wins
Sometimes it is the small wins that can make a real difference. In the realm of psychological and emotional wellbeing, there is a growing appreciation for concepts that help us better regulate our nervous system and promote feelings of safety, calm, and connection. One such concept that has gained traction in recent years is "glimmers," a term coined by Deb Dana (2018), a licensed therapist and expert in the Polyvagal Theory. Glimmers are essentially the antidote to the better-known concept of "triggers," which activate a stress or survival response. The term refers to tiny, fleeting moments that spark feelings of safety, joy, and wellbeing—moments that nourish us.
Glimmers are a natural byproduct of Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory, which explores how our autonomic nervous system responds to cues of safety and danger. By learning to recognize and cultivate glimmers, we can harness these brief moments of positive emotion to nurture our psychological wellbeing.
What are glimmers?
Glimmers are subtle, often understated experiences that evoke a sense of safety, connection, and contentment. They are the opposite of triggers, which activate our fight, flight, or freeze responses. Glimmers can be as simple as feeling warmth from the sun on your skin, hearing a bird's song, noticing a smile from a stranger, or experiencing the calming presence of a loved one. These moments activate the ventral vagal state of our autonomic nervous system, associated with feelings of connection, safety, and wellbeing.
Deb Dana introduced the term "glimmers" in her work to help people shift their focus toward positive micro-experiences that often go unnoticed. While triggers can be loud, intense, and easy to identify, glimmers are quiet, delicate, and require mindful attention to appreciate.
The Role of Polyvagal Theory
To understand glimmers, it helps to briefly explore the Polyvagal Theory, that explains how the autonomic nervous system is continuously scanning the environment for cues of safety and danger. This process, called "neuroception," occurs unconsciously and influences our physiological state. Put simply, according to Polyvagal Theory, the autonomic nervous system has three primary states: safety, danger, and life threat.
1. Ventral Vagal State (safety): This state is associated with feelings of safety, connection, and social engagement. When we are in this state, our nervous system is calm, and we feel connected to others and the world around us.
2. Sympathetic State (danger): This state is associated with mobilization and the fight-or-flight response. When we perceive a threat, our body prepares to respond by increasing heart rate, releasing stress hormones, and heightening alertness.
3. Dorsal Vagal State (life threat): This state is associated with immobilization, withdrawal, and shutdown. When a threat seems overwhelming, our nervous system may respond by shutting down to conserve energy.
Glimmers help us access and remain in the ventral vagal state, promoting feelings of safety, connection, and wellbeing. By actively noticing and savouring glimmers, we train our nervous system to spend more time in this state, improving our overall mental and emotional health.
Wellbeing benefits of glimmers
Increased Emotional Resilience: When we experience frequent moments of safety and connection, our nervous system becomes better equipped to handle stress and adversity. Instead of getting stuck in fight, flight, or freeze responses, we can more easily return to a state of calm and engagement.
Reduced Anxiety and Stress: Glimmers serve as a counterbalance to the daily stressors that can activate our sympathetic nervous system. By consciously noticing these small positive moments, we help regulate our nervous system and reduce anxiety. Each glimmer provides a brief respite from stress, allowing our body and mind to recalibrate.
Enhanced Mindfulness and Presence: Presence is required to notice glimmers. It involves tuning into the subtle details of your environment and internal experience. This practice of mindfulness helps ground you in the present moment, reducing rumination and worry about the past or future, and this builds over time.
Strengthened Relationships: Glimmers often arise in social interactions, such as a warm smile, a kind word, or a moment of shared laughter. Recognizing these moments of connection strengthens relationships and reinforces feelings of safety and trust. As you become more attuned to glimmers, you also become more aware of opportunities to create these moments for others, fostering deeper connections and empathy.
How to find and cultivate glimmers
The beauty of glimmers is that they are everywhere if you know where to look. Here are some strategies for recognizing and cultivating glimmers in your daily life:
1. Slow Down and Engage Your Senses: Take time to pause and notice your surroundings using your senses. Look for small details that bring a sense of joy or calm, such as the texture of a leaf, the sound of rain, or the scent of flowers. Notice the colours, sounds, textures, tastes, and smells that bring you comfort or joy.
2. Practice Gratitude: Reflect on moments in your day that made you feel safe or connected. Writing these in a journal can help you remember and savour these experiences.
4. Connect with Nature: Spending time in nature provides abundant opportunities for glimmers, from the rustle of leaves to the warmth of sunlight.
5. Notice Social Cues: Be attentive to positive social interactions, such as smiles, eye contact, or friendly conversations. Recognizing these moments reinforces feelings of connection.
Embracing glimmers is not just about noticing fleeting joys; it’s about building a foundation of resilience, mindfulness, and connection that can transform our overall mental and emotional health. The small wins can make a big difference.